Honouring the death of a loved one, especially on death anniversaries, provokes lingering feelings of loss and denial to an individual. Upon the death of a close relative, the death anniversary is a way of paying respect to the person, however, brings back a mix of feelings of anger, denial, and bargaining, which obviously does not ultimately ‘complete’ the five stages of grief.

When the death of my grandparents came along, their death anniversaries was a way of paying respect to what they have done within their lives. However, it also brought back feelings of denial and bargaining within my head, ultimately resulting to anger. Thoughts such as ‘Why didn’t I spend enough time with them?’, or ‘We should’ve appreciated, as grandchildren, the things they did for us’, constitutes our grief for their loss, because our (or my own individual) innate desire is for them to come back so that we could fulfil and satisfy ourselves that we have completed our life’s journey with that special individual. A sense of ‘incompleteness’ will always be there whenever I think of my grandparents.

-Guest Author, Mary-Rose